Choices
by SlytherinDoe
Summary: Sometimes one simple choice can change the course of history. Lily is a living example of this, and as her life become's forever closely intertwined with her best friend, Severus, she will discover her choices can change even a war. Canon until Hogwarts.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Guys! Yes, I know you're all groaning! "Not another Sev/Lily story!" Sorry! Couldn't help it, and I hope you enjoy this one! It's going to be rather different from the others, and MUCH LONGER! **

**Going to try to do most of it in Lily's point of view, but there will also be Sev.**

**Jo Rowling owns all characters! Thanks for giving us such wonderful ones to work with! :)**

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><p>Lily walked quickly towards the small deserted, and slightly dingy, playground. She wondered if he'd even be there. After all, she had been quite rude to him when she had first met him. She had thought he was teasing her. Calling her names. Something she had seen in those black eyes, however, told her differently. They had looked almost pleading as she had turned her nose up at the supposed "insults", and that was what had brought her back. His accusations were so out of place yet seemingly so genuine, that she needed to know if it was actually real, or just some cruel joke like Petunia had told her.<p>

Unlike Lily, Petunia was never one to allow fanciful thoughts float around in her rather thick skull. She was more apt to gossip about the whosits and whatsits of anyone and everyone around them. It was quite annoying actually, but she was still Lily's sister and she'd be damned if anyone called her names.

_Muggle__?_

Then again, the boy had called Lily a name too. Though that time his voice had none of the venom he spat at her sister. A witch. He had said it almost desperately, and when Petunia had scoffed when he claimed himself as a wizard Lily thought he looked as if he would blow right then and there. His sureness had both frightened and excited her.

Lily pushed back the rickety iron gate and moved to stand awkwardly beside an abandoned swing. No one was there, as usual. Her heart sunk as she searched fervently for the boy. She even looked behind the bushes he had spied on them from for... how long? She didn't know, but the idea creeped her out a bit. She shivered and continued her search.

Fifteen minutes later and she was still no further than when she had began. Lily sighed as she chose one of the empty swings, and sat down heavily. She propelled herself slightly with her toes, but her heart was not in it. What was she doing? She was just being stupid. Things like that just don't exist. Besides, she didn't even know if she could trust the boy to tell her the truth. He was from Spinner's End, after all. He was obviously just poking fun at her. The few kids who lived there and went to Lily's school behaved that way. They were outright bullies, actually, so why should this one be any different?

"Thought you'd come back and laugh at the freak, eh?" A soft voice said behind her. Lily whipped around and stared at its owner in surprise and slight fear. He was wearing the same ill fitting jeans and baggy T-shirt as he was yesterday (though the coat was absent), and his long black locks effectively shielded his bent face in curtains. He struck a sinister figure, even considering he could only be about nine or ten, and Lily got off her swing in a hurry. She took a small step back.

"No. I- I just wanted to talk." she stammered. He looked up slightly and she saw an eyebrow raise questioningly.

"'Bout what?"

"Well, yesterday you said I was a witch a- and that you were a wizard." she practically blurted.

"So?" He looked up at her defiantly and that was when she got her first real look at him. He had a slightly thin face with pale, almost sallow, skin and a rather hooked nose. His hair was the color of ebony, and hung lankly about his head but what really caught Lily's attention was his eyes. They were darker then she remembered and held her gaze with such an intensity, Lily did not know if she could muster the strength to look away. They were wonderful yet intimidating.

"Well, is it- is it true?" She noticed the hope that had leaked into her voice. This was ridiculous. Witches! Wizards! Magic? Still, she couldn't help but wonder if the boy was actually speaking the truth. No, of course he wasn't. He would just as soon laugh at her for actually believing him.

_Well__, __if __that__'__s __how __he__'__s __going __to __be__..._

To her utter surprise however, the boy just smirked at her. Bending slowly to the ground he picked a single blade of grass and held it between two of his long skinny fingers. Placing it in his palm, Lily watched as the blade moved slowly upwards and hovered in the air, spinning like a helicopter blade. It flew gently towards her and stopped right in front of her eyes, then proceeded to balance gently on her nose. She giggled.

"Did you do that?" He glanced up at her with a small smile and a slight flush mounted his cheeks. He nodded.

"So it was real." she whispered more to herself than anyone else. The boy merely looked at her. "I'm really a witch?"

"Definitely. You've got loads of magic." She moved closer to him, and she saw his eyes widen as she stood only about a pace away.

"Tell me then! How? Why?" He grinned shyly at her and took a cautious step back.

"Meet me here tomorrow, same time. I'll tell you all about it then." With one last look at Lily, he turned sharply away from the playground and began to walk away.

"Wait!" Lily shouted. The boy stopped and turned back to face her. "You never told me your name!"

He paused for a second then answered back, "Severus. Severus Snape."

"Mine's Lily Evans. Nice to meet you Severus!" She glanced quickly down at her small watch. Great! She was late! Mum was going to kill her! Waving good-bye to Severus, she turned and flew out of the playground back towards home. Her head was swimming with what she had just witnessed, and what she now knew, so she did not notice that Severus was still standing where she had left him.

"Nice to meet you too, Lily." he whispered to himself, and turned on his heel towards home. There was a new spring in his step.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello everyone! I hope you enjoy this next chapter of "Choices." As you will soon see, most is directly quoted from 'The Prince's Tale', Chapter 33 of Deathly Hallows. Although all that is said between the two (except for a bit at the end) is direct from DH, I have tried to change the rest up a bit. **

**JK Rowling owns all characters! Ob- vious- ly...**

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><p>"But I have done magic outside school!" Lily said with concern. Severus scoffed.<p>

"We're alright. We haven't got wands yet. They let you off when you're a kid and you can't help it. But when you're eleven," Severus raised his eyebrows and nodded toward her in importance, "and they start training you, then you've got to go careful."

Lily tried to imagine actually controlling the thing Severus so adamantly claimed was magic, through a wand. What she was able to do was irregular and, usually, uncontrolled. Only rarely was she able to manipulate the flow of- a sort of energy?- to do as she wished and at those time, she hadn't even realized she had done them. Grasping a stray twig, she twirled it gracefully in the air trying to imagine sparks flying out the end or something of that nature. Feeling suddenly foolish, she dropped the makeshift wand and leaned towards Severus. Lily watched his eyes widen and he leaned slowly away from her, as if afraid to let her touch him.

"It is real, isn't it? It's not a joke? Petunia said you're lying to me. Petunia says there is no Hogwarts. It is real, isn't it?" Try as she might she could not keep the desperate hope out of her voice. Severus studied her for a moment, then leaned back towards her, and looked her squarely in the eyes. With a start, Lily realized that his eyes were actually black. Literally black! She had never seen such dark eyes before and, looking into them, it felt as if she could get lost in the fathomless ebony.

"It's real for us," he whispered. "Not for her. But we'll get the letter, you and me." He smiled reassuringly. Lily's heart thudded against her ribs in excitement.

"Really?" she whispered back.

"Definitely," he answered with conviction and he lay down in the soft cool grass of the riverbank with his hands behind his head. Lily studied him. He was so _confident__._

"And will it really come by owl?" Lily wondered aloud.

"Normally," he said and shrugged, "but you're Muggle-born, so someone from the school will have to come and explain it to your parents."

"Does it make any difference, being Muggle-born?" It was a question that had pulled at her throughout their conversation today. Severus visibly stiffened and Lily watched his eyes glide over her. She gazed at him in defiance, trying desperately to disguise her worry.

_Why should he hesitate?_

"No," he said finally. "It doesn't make any difference."

"Good." Lily let out a breath, and relaxed. Encouraged, Severus went on.

"You've got loads of magic. I saw that. All the time I was watching you..." Severus caught himself hurriedly and looked away from her, his cheeks taking on a slight pink color. Lily didn't say anything, however, and simply stretched herself out beside him on the grass. The cool breeze felt good in contrast to the scorching sun of early August. Lily closed her eyes.

"How are things at your house?" She tried to sound nonchalant, but her voice wavered a bit in spite of herself. It was apparently the wrong question to ask for as she turned to look at Severus, she saw he was sitting upright again, a little crease between his furrowed eyebrows.

"Fine," he said curtly, his voice tinged with anger that, quite plainly, gave away his blatant lie. The subject breached, Lily decided she could only move forward.

"They're not arguing anymore?" she asked cautiously.

"Oh yes, they're arguing," he bit out through clenched teeth. Lily watched him work his jaw angrily, as he shredded some of the old oak's fallen leaves. He seemed unaware he was doing it. "But it won't be that long and I'll be gone." This last statement was said with such conviction, such longing, that Lily felt a deep sadness for the boy. Even though she had not known him for more than a week, she considered him her friend and she cared for him. He was the only one who knew about her strangeness and did not wrinkle his nose at it or tell her to hide it. He nurtured that side of her she had always been slightly afraid of and always confused about. He was special, so unlike any of her school friends.

"Doesn't your dad like magic?" She could tell she was pushing it, for at the mention of 'dad', his jaw had clenched tightly.

"He doesn't like anything, much."

"Severus?" She perked up a bit when a small smile twitched at the corners of his lips.

"Yeah?" It was probably best to shelve the topic of his parents, at least for now.

"Tell me about the dementors again."

"What d'you want to know about them for?"

"If I use magic outside of school-" Severus let out a sound of exasperation.

"They wouldn't give you to the dementors for that! Dementors are for people who do really bad stuff. They guard the wizarding prison, Azkaban. You're not going to end up in Azkaban, you're too-" He halted abruptly and Lily watched as his cheeks flushed a deep red. She shoved his shoulder teasingly. Suddenly, he was on his feet. Lily looked around.

"Tuney!" Severus scowled, his eyes flashing angrily.

"Who's spying now?" he shouted. "What d' you want?" He gestured to the surrounding riverbank. Lily sensed this would not end well.

"What is that you're wearing anyway?" she said, a finger pointing directly at Severus' chest. Petunia sneered. "Your mum's blouse?" A large crack came from above, and Lily watched in horror as a branch came crashing down near Petunia. It clipped her on the shoulder and, tears of pain bursting from her sister's eyes, she ran swiftly towards their house.

"Did you make that happen?" she asked Severus. He looked terrified.

"No." He didn't fool her though.

"You did!" Lily started to back away. "You did! You hurt her!" Severus was becoming frantic.

"No- no I didn't!" he stuttered. Throwing him a scathing glare, she rushed off through the thicket in the direction of Tuney. Pushing brambles and branches roughly away from her, Lily ran trying to catch up with her sister. Tuney, however, was much older and, consequently, faster. She was probably halfway home by now. Lily's pace slowed as she rounded the bend leading from the river to the abandoned playground where she had first met Severus last weekend. Maybe she was... overreacting? She had often done just as he had in fits of anger or hurt without meaning to. It was uncontrollable, and whenever it would happen she would always feel deeply sorry about it. Perhaps, the same had happened with Severus and the branch, and Lily had just left him. Left him standing all alone! She cursed herself inwardly and, swallowing her pride, walked slowly back towards the river.

"Sev?" she said softly, using the rough trunk of their oak to lean against as she peered hopefully around it. Severus was sitting cross-legged right where she had left him, his head bent with his black locks drifting smoothly about him in the slight fall breeze.

"What do you want, Lily?" he retorted. She was taken aback at the bitterness in his voice.

"I'm... I'm sorry. Alright? I shouldn't have accused you."

"I didn't mean to, you know." He looked up into her eyes, and Lily could feel the angry guilt radiating off of him.

"Yeah, I know." She sat down beside him and smiled. "One time when Tuney stole my favorite teddy, I turned her tea set into a mess tiny hopping frogs." She giggled. "They were actually kinda cute, but Tuney screamed and pranced about on top of her bed. By the way she acted you would've thought they were going to swallow her up! Mum had a fit." Severus chuckled. "Sev? Should I tell them?" she asked quietly.

"No. You can't. They wouldn't believe you Lily and, besides," he looked at her seriously, "the wizarding world wouldn't appreciate it. There's this Statute of Secrecy..."

"What would happen if I told them? Azkaban?" A hint of her worry escaped and Severus looked up.

"Nah. they wouldn't send you to Azkaban." Truth was, though, he really didn't know what they would do to her. He carefully avoided the first question, and was rewarded when Lily relaxed.

"Good, though I don't know how I can keep you a secret, Sev. Truth is, Tuney has already painted a pretty dark picture of you to my parents as it is." Severus smirked.

"Just tell them that you met me on the playground or something. You wouldn't be lying then, and there's no reason that you have to tell them about Hogwarts. They'll find out soon enough. For now," he leaned close to her ear and whispered, "it's our secret." She let out a very girlish giggle and stood up, pulling him with her.

"Come on, Sev! Let's play a game."

"Sev?" he asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Oh, it's just how I think of you in my head. Much easier than Severus, though I do love your name! I don't know anyone else who has it!"

" 'S alright then, I guess." Though Lily saw his lips twitch upwards. "A game then?"

"Yeah, how 'bout 'hide and go seek'?"

"Aren't we a bit old for that?"

"Come on! We're only ten. Live a little!" He rolled his eyes and sighed exasperatedly.

"Alright then."

The two children spent the rest of the afternoon together. One innocent auburn head, chased fervently by a 'older that his years' black one. Blissfully unaware of the way their lives were fast becoming intertwined.

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><p><strong>AN: I know this is starting off a bit slow but I hope you enjoy the rest of the story. I have it mostly mapped out, and I rather like the way it will go! Expect this to become a very long fic! **

**Thank you for reading, and please review! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**This chapter is just some drabble between the two during one of the Summer days they have to themselves before Lily's final year at Muggle school starts. Nothing too intense. ;)**

**I hope you enjoy!**

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><p>"What's this rubbish?" Severus scowled at the colorful book in front of him, his nose wrinkled disdainfully.<p>

"It's not rubbish!" Lily cried indignantly. "They're stories! My favorite ones, matter of fact!" Severus gave a snort.

"Muggle stories!"

"What do you mean by that? Muggle?" She gave him a look of confusion.

"Non-magic folk," he shrugged.

"Are muggles bad?" She noticed a slight hesitation as he answered.

"Muggles? Well... er... not all are 'bad', I guess." He looked at her. "Some are worse than others and, well, your sister's one of the worst!" he finished with a smirk. " 'Sides, they're just not like us. You and me, ya know."

"_You__'__re_ the worst, Severus Snape!" but she pushed him teasingly and giggled, not really meaning her words. He smiled.

"So, you like your book?" He asked, nodding towards the _Beginners __Charms_ book she held protectively in her lap. Lily ran her hand reverently over the yellow tinted pages.

"It's amazing!" She stole a glance at her own copy of _The __Lion__, __the __Witch__, __and __the __Wardrobe _that lay open in front of Severus. They had agreed to take turns looking at each other's books today, his magical ones, and her muggle books. She had tried to gather all the stories she could think of that had anything to do with magic in them, but now she sort of regretted her decision and felt slightly foolish bringing her favorite fairy tales under his scrutiny. After all, they were for children and, as she was quickly discovering, Severus was a very mature child. He almost seemed to her, at times, that he was an adult stuck in a ten year old's body.

She had never met anyone like him, and she respected him immensely for his vast knowledge and intelligence. She hoped he didn't think she was just some silly girl, tolerating her only because she was the only other magical person within his reach. The more she worried about it, though, the more she convinced herself that it was the case and Lily tried extremely hard to soak up all of the information he threw at her in order to prove herself to him.

"What about yours?" she asked cautiously.

"Actually, it's sort of interesting." That was surprising considering he had just called the book 'rubbish.' "The wardrobe sounds like modified version of a Vanishing Cabinet. The witch is pretty self explainable, but the talking animals... Even in the wizarding world I haven't heard of anything like that." His little brow furrowed in thought as he ran his fingers gently over the illustrated pages. Severus had a deep respect for books, any books, but especially his books. Each one he owned were marked and annotated to the extreme, and sometimes Lily wasn't even able to read the actual text!

"Vanishing Cabinet?"

"Yeah, they're like the large wardrobe in the book," he pointed absentmindedly at a picture of the ornate cabinet. "They come in sets. All you have to do is step into one, mutter an incantation, and you'll appear wherever the sister of the first cabinet is located. Good for hiding from someone, or something." He sat back mysteriously.

"Wow," was all Lily could say. She had found herself saying that a lot when Severus and her would meet by the riverbank and discuss magic. No, _their _riverbank as she had come to think of it. She loved being here, talking to Sev about anything and everything that arose to her mind. Mostly they would discuss magic, him explaining everything to her about the world she never knew existed. In fact, she had been spending most of her remaining days of Summer vacation here with him, in loo of being with her old school friends. Compared to Severus, they were dull and boring. Lily was pulled out of her musings when she realized Severus was still talking.

" 'Course, most magic folk use the Floo network, or just apparate. Much easier, and you can go more places." He glanced at her, knowing she would have to ask, and loving the part of the 'teacher' he oftentimes played in their conversations.

"Come on Sev," Lily sighed in mock exasperation, "just tell me already." He brightened considerably and launched into a detailed explanation of the Floo network and apparation while Lily listened dumbfounded. Everything was so amazing in the Wizarding World and Lily was slightly jealous that she had to grow up virtually in the dark about everything that went on within it, while Severus at least knew of its existence.

"Have you ever used the Floo?" Lily asked with excitement. _Maybe __he __would __let __her __try__..._

"Nope, not once." His expression changed from the almost lighthearted (Severus never seemed actually cheerful) one he wore when they would talk about magic to a much darker, more bitter expression. "Mum didn't have our fireplace connected to the network. If you want your house to be connected, the ministry has to send someone over and... well... I suppose Mum didn't want them to.. er.. see." He looked away from her and tugged absentmindedly on the over-long sleeves of his faded black t-shirt. Lily gave him a puzzled look, and moved a little closer to her friend.

"See?" she asked.

"Just forget it, Lily." he mumbled angrily. " 'Sides, if Mum really wanted to go anywhere and take me, she could just apparate us. She rarely does though."

"But you have apparated?" Lily asked in excitement, yet again dropping the very sensitive subject of Severus' home life.

"Once." he answered. "Mum wanted to get some ingredients for a potion for my father. It was really jerky and I sorta felt sick afterwards, but..." he gave a small wistful sigh, "You should've seen it, Lily!" His face lit up considerably. "The apothecary was amazing! All sorts of potion ingredients neatly packed away in bottles, or loose in crates, or even just piled on the floor." Severus reached for a large, black leather bound book amongst their pile and gently lifted it towards him. _Beginners __Potion __Making_ the title read. He ran his hand lovingly over the cover. "I've already brewed a few of the Potions in here." he whispered.

"Where'd you get the ingredients?"

"Nicked 'em from Mum's stores."

"She didn't notice?" Lily asked.

"Nah. I never took enough for it to be noticed, and I don't have the opportunity to brew very often. Mum can't be home 'cus she doesn't really want me brewing yet."

"Why? Is it dangerous?" she asked a little nervously. He shrugged.

"Well, sometimes you can get an explosion, but I've never had that happen. I'm really careful." This worried Lily.

"Severus!" she scolded. "You could get hurt!"

"It's really no big deal! You have to really mess up to get a substantial explosion, and I make sure I know exactly what I'm doing before I do it." he defended himself, clutching the Potions book to his chest. But Lily was scared now.

"But Sev! What if there was an accident and you got hurt and nobody knew?" she gazed worriedly into his downturned face, trying to catch his eye through the curtain of black hair he oftentimes used to shield himself. "Sev, you're my best friend." At that he looked up.

"Best Friend?" the black eyes showed his suppressed hopefulness. "Really?"

"Of course, Sev. I just don't want you to get hurt." She touched his arm and was surprised when she felt him flinch away. "Just promise me you won't brew alone anymore."

"But I'm real careful..." he began, but Lily stopped him.

"Please, Sev." He looked into her pleading expression and found that no matter how much he wanted to, he could not deny what she asked of him. He just couldn't say no to those almond shaped, beautifully green eyes.

"Well, perhaps you could brew with me?" he finally consented. Lily nodded and smiled.

"Definitely." Lily sat back against the oak tree and sighed. School started in less than a week, and she was not looking forwards to it. For one, she didn't feel the usual excitement at learning her new subjects of the year as she normally would have. How could she? In a years time she would be preparing for the subjects in Sev's many books like Charms, Potions, and Transfiguration. She didn't know if she would be able to sit through another abysmal year of Penmanship, or Italian. On another note, school beginning also meant she wouldn't be able to see Sev as much as she was fast getting used to. They would meet up most everyday on their cool and shady riverbank, spending the day talking about Hogwarts. Sometimes, if she was lucky, Lily would convince him to play a game of 'tag' or 'hide and seek' with her. She was oftentimes unable to get him to take part in such foolishness but Lily always enjoyed herself no matter what they ended up spending the day doing. She just loved being with her best friend. Seemingly reading her thoughts, Sev sat back with her and asked,

"Are you looking forward to school?"

"Not really." she replied. "My muggle subjects aren't near as interesting as... well..." she gestured to the pile of magical textbooks, "any of this."

"Yeah." he said with a hint of disappointment in his voice.

"Plus, I won't be able to see you as much. School and homework takes up so much of my time! We could probably still see each other on the weekends though. Maybe you could come over to my house sometime! My parents really want to meet you." At once, his expression darkened.

"I don't think that's such a good idea, Lily." he said softly.

"Why?"

"It's just not. We come from very different walks of life, and didn't your sister already tell them how horrible I am?" At first she thought he was talking about the Muggle versus Wizarding family difference, but then she realized. No, he thought her parents wouldn't like him because he was from Spinner's End. After all, they knew nothing of the magical world for Lily had not told them anything about it.

"Oh Sev, don't worry about Tuney. Mum and Dad have taken to not listening to her as closely as she would like to think. And they don't care about where you live. They're not like that. I know they won't judge-"

"I don't need their pity!" he practically shouted at her. She jumped back slightly. As she watched he stood up and stalked haughtily towards the river's edge. Sitting on the banks, he twirled a twig in the mud, stirring a cloud of brown water. Lily joined him, and watched the tip of the twig poke at a stray crayfish who had hidden itself amongst the reedy shallows.

"Alright then. We can just meet here, but have you thought about when it gets too cold to come outside for very long?" Silence, then a sigh.

"Fine. But only when it's absolutely necessary."

"Good!" she exclaimed and hugged him roughly around the middle, taking note of the slight hitch in his breath as she did so. "Now," she said releasing him, "which of these 'harmless' potions have you done?"

Moving back towards the pile, they examined his potion's books. Him telling her all she wished to know and her drinking it up with as much fervor as if it were the finest wine being offered to her. Neither one wishing for these wonderful Summer days to end.

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><p><strong>AN: I realize this fic is not too exciting at the moment but until they get to Hogwarts I can't think of too many adventure the two may be able to have. I hope you enjoy it anyways :) **

**Please review and thank you for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

**My longest chapter yet! I hope you enjoy, and don't forget to review! :)**

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><p>Tiny icy flakes floated wistfully around the abandoned paved street. They drifted softly about for a while before finally coming to rest amongst the snowy drifts that had already accumulated there from the previous night's storm. It had been falling thickly all night but, now, only a few fat flakes were making their way slowly towards the ground. A lone child was making his way purposefully towards the house at the end of the snow covered cul-de-sac. His pace was quick, eager it seemed, and his black eyes flitted nervously across the unfamiliar neighborhood every so often. The threadbare sweater, scuffed jeans, and too-large-for-his skinny-figure coat was in stark contrast with the pristine perfection of the houses which lined the street he walked on. As he turned onto one of the house's driveways, he drew in an apprehensive breath pushing his long black locks away from his thin pale face. Steeling himself for the worst, he raised a fist to the door and knocked softly. Immediately it opened.<p>

"Sev!" A tight hug wrapped around him warmly, as copper hair flying towards his face, almost forcing him to spit the silky strands out. The intoxicating flowery smell of her hair enveloped him, and he felt his knees go weak as he inhaled deeply.

"Hey Lily." he mumbled as he regretfully released her and gave a shy smile towards a point directly behind his grinning friend.

"Ah, so we meet at last. Our daughter has told us so much about you." A hand was offered to him and he shook it firmly while Severus wondered, for a moment, which daughter he was referring to. The man, who Severus knew to be Lily's father, smiled at him kindly.

"Nice to meet you too, Mr. Evans." he said softly.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Severus." the pretty woman standing beside Mr. Evans said smiling as well. "Lily speaks very highly of you."

"Mum!" Lily blushed slightly, and took Severus' hand pulling him towards a part of the house out of which the most enticing smells were drifting. Severus closed his eyes and took a deep breath, almost able to taste the delectable smelling food.

"Smells good." he managed to get out. She laughed.

"Of course it does! And I expect you to eat every bit of it. You're way too skinny as it is." He tried to glare but ended up just smirking at her teasing. The expression fell off his face, however, when a horse-like girl peered snobbishly around the corner, and glared at him with her nose in the air.

"What is _he_ doing here?" Great, not that monster.

"Tuney! I invited him. He's my friend. My _best _friend." Severus gasped a little. Every time she said that he could not help feeling a bit in shock. She was his best friend, no doubt, but that she thought of him, Severus Snape, as _her best friend_? It was simply remarkable.

"Well, the least he could've done was clean up. Honestly, it's Christmas and he shows up wearing... well, that." Petunia finished dramatically, gesturing to all of him. Severus was about to retort when a looming presence behind him stopped him.

"Petunia Evans! That is not how we speak to our guests!" Mrs. Evans walked into the room, her hands on her hips, and her fingers clutching a soapy rag. "It's Christmas for goodness sake! Apologize!"

"Mum, he-!" Mrs. Evans sent such a withering stare directly at Petunia, the girl stopped mid-sentence and shrunk a little.

"Apologize. _Now_." Petunia turned to Severus a hard, bitter look in her muddy brownish eyes. After working her jaw for a moment she finally replied,

"Sorry." It was barely mumbled.

"What was that?" Mrs. Evans smirked at her eldest daughter holding a cupped hand sarcastically to her ear, and Severus felt an instant liking to this adult Evans. Even if she was just a Muggle.

"I'm sorry!" Petunia shouted then stomped off in a huff. Severus smiled slightly at Mrs. Evans who simply nodded and began to wipe the table down with her rag.

"Almost ready, dears. Only a few minutes. Why don't you go wash up?" Lily nodded, and pulled Severus' arm roughly around the same corner her sister had disappeared by not moments ago. She led him into a small room, almost as small as a broom cupboard, and pushed him in front of a small pearly sink. Reaching across him, she dispelled a pea sized drop of pinkish soap into her small hand and began to scrub her hands and forearms. Severus did the same and the pair held their slippery soapy skin under the warm water, watching the bubbles disappear into the drain. When they were finished, he held his head down a bit and looked at her from behind the black curtains of hair.

"I did wash," he whispered. "This is the best I could do with-" He stopped suddenly and looked into her green eyes angrily. Angry at himself for apologizing. Angry at Lily because she was looking at him with such compassion in her eyes that it made his stomach sick with embarrassment. Angry that he had made such a fool of himself by agreeing to come to her home as he was. He just didn't belong. "I- I think I'll just go," he said finally and started to stalk out of the bathroom when she grabbed his arm.

"No, Sev." she said, and to his surprise (and slight annoyance) giggled. "Please, stay. Tuney's a brat and wouldn't know a genuine friend if one bit her on the arse." She giggled again as Severus made a face at the thought. "Besides," she went on blushing slightly, "you smell really good." She smiled, pushing his shoulder teasingly as his eyebrow made its way towards his hairline and his sallow cheeks flushed a deep red.

_What did she say?_

He didn't have much time to think on it however, for at that moment her parents called for them that dinner and Lily pulled him back into the kitchen while he desperately tried to hide his blush. As his cheeks cooled, he scanned the room. The Evans stood helter skelter about the kitchen, Mr. Evans having found a spot next to the turkey, Mrs. Evans standing near where Lily and Severus had entered the kitchen, and Petunia skulking haughtily beside the elegantly placed table. Mr. Evans seemed to gather himself a bit before stating, "I'll say grace." and all at once, Severus found himself holding Lily's hand. Merlin! He was actually holding Lily Evans hand! Or rather, she was holding his hand, and she hadn't shrunk away. In fact, she gripped it firmly, and Severus barely noted that Mrs. Evans had possession of his other limp palm.

"... and protect us from evil as we go about our lives. Amen." Everyone lifted their heads, and immediately the attention was directed to the delicious smelling edibles on the table and surrounding counter tops. Gathering a bit of everything onto his plate, no one had to ask Severus twice as he dug into the meal. Everything was delectable, they never had anything like this at his home, but he forced himself to take small bites. He would not embarrass himself further by making an animal out of his manners. Nevertheless, his plate was quickly empty and he stood for dessert before anyone else had. Instead of getting any, even after eyeing a beautiful steaming apple pie, he placed his plate in the sink and sat back down in his place at the opposite head of the table, beside Lily. Mr. Evans stared at him cooly as Severus' tried to prevent himself from getting a second helping. The man's calculating stare made Severus uncomfortable, but he tried his best to appear defiant. Though not disrespectful, Severus was not meek. It was simply not in his character, and he would not let anyone push him around. Well, most anyone...

"So, Severus," Lily's father began, " Lily has told us so much about you, but I don't believe I've heard anything directly from the source." He smiled at Severus. "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Ah, the infernal question. He knew it was bound to come up and had prepared himself exactly for when it did. Lily, however, hadn't seemed to be expecting anything of the sort, and gave him a nervous glance. He smirked back at her, then turned to Mr. Evans.

"Well sir, I hope to one day become a chemist." Lily giggled, then stopped as her mother sent her a scathing look. Severus' knew it wasn't because she thought it was a stupid idea, but because she knew what he really meant. A Potions Master. That's what he really wanted to do but, of course, he couldn't tell the Evans that.

The rest of the night went without a hitch, except for the burning stares Petunia sent him from her spot at the table. After he had told everyone he aspired to actually be something of worth, a chemist, they had looked on him and Lily perhaps more approvingly than before. Well, again, all except Petunia of course. She had made sure she was as far away from him as possible as if afraid she could somehow contract his scruffiness, but he didn't particularly care because after everyone had some dessert Lily pulled him away from her family and walked him slowly up the staircase.

"Where are we going, Lily?"

"I want to show you my room!" she replied, and they rounded a corner ducking into the first door on the right. What he saw was anything but what he expected. Of course, Lily was hardly a 'girly-girl.' Actually, at heart, she was more of a tomboy. Adventurous, kind, and extremely intelligent. To him, it seemed whenever he spoke she would cling desperately to his each and every word: she soaked up information like a sponge, retaining it just as easily. But when he walked inside her room the image of frills and girlish pink vanished, replaced instead by lightly yellow painted walls which were clean and concise, enclosing a twin bed (not unlike his own) but which had lavender colored bedsheets and a comforter draped elegantly over-top the mattress, whereas his simply had an old quilt. Bookshelves lined every wall, spines worn with use and age, and each cover in its own place. The entire room was very clean and orderly with the exception, perhaps, of a small vanity located in the corner. Combs, brushes, nail polish, and perfume bottles were strewn every which way across its surface. The most intoxicating factor of this place, hardly surprising, was its scent. Her. It smelled of her through and through, and Severus thought that even the lingering whiffs of dinner that wafted past every so often could never compare to her smell. Flowery and light was the only way he could describe it and he took a few good deep breaths before he realized she was gesturing for him to sit on the bed next to her.

"You know, Sev. I think they really liked you!"

"Yeah, well..." he tried to sound aloof but he was secretly pleased he had impressed the Evans tonight. He had been worrying it like a sore tooth all week preceding.

"I knew they would. You're just so mature, I couldn't see how they wouldn't like you." Her confidence in him made his soul swell for a moment but then he let out a breath as he looked out the darkening window. Soon, very soon, he would have to return home. Return to a place where he could only look forward to possibly seeing Lily on the weekends, if even then. They sometimes had to cancel their meetings if Lily was required to be somewhere or if, in Severus' case, his father came home in a _bad_ mood. Then he definitely wouldn't want to see her. Out of the sheer shame of it.

"So. What d'you think?" she asked waving her hand about her room and pulling him out of his dark thoughts.

"It's wonderful, Lily. You have a lot of books." He smiled at her, and she grinned back widely.

"I knew you'd like them! I love books too. I want to own a book shop one day, or that's what I wanted to do before..." she hesitated and smiled mischievously. "Well, before I met you."

"You can do anything you want, Lily. Just cause you're a witch doesn't mean you can't own a book store." he smiled reassuringly at her. "Mum always complains how there wasn't one in Hogsmeade."

"You think?"

"I know." She smiled brightly and placed an arm around him in a half-hug. "Thanks Sev. Oh!" she smiled at him as she got up and rifled a moment through a bedside drawer. Finally finding what she was looking for, she stood, smiling softly at him with her head slightly bowed. Her cheeks flushed a bit as she handed him a lumpy package wrapped in red shiny paper and all tied up in a green ribbon bow. He took it gently in his hands, staring wide-eyed up at her with his mouth slightly agape. She had gotten him a Christmas present? He grinned widely back at her, furiously fighting the wetness that had begun to leak into his eyes. "It's nothing much," Lily explained as her eyes searched his apologetically, "but you told me that your favorite color was green so I thought..." she stared at him a moment. "Well, just open it!"

His throat tightened as he slowly slipped the paper off the gift and saw what it was. A scarf. A handsome grass green scarf. He clutched it, fighting back the tears of gratitude as he choked out,"I really like it, Lily. It's amazing!" He couldn't remember another time he had gotten such a nice gift from anyone, but just the fact that she had thought of him made his heart soar with joy.

"I'm sorry it's not very grand," Lily went on hurriedly. "Mum helped me knit it, and then I did something to it special myself." At this he looked up at her, and she gazed at the scarf proudly. "Well, go on. Try it on if you want to find out!" He gladly wrapped the long scarf about his thin neck and gasped when he realized what she had done. The fabric was warm, marvelously so and most definitely magically. This was very advanced and to have done it without a wand, without any training, he just couldn't fathom it and stared at her for a moment in amazement.

"Lily, how did you-?" He looked at her gesturing to the scarf that was wrapped tightly around his neck. She giggled.

"It took me a while... and a few tries." She pointed to a trash can which smoked slightly. "I had to make a couple of them on account of me heating them too much and catching them on fire."

"Lily!"

"I know, but I was really careful..."

"You could have set the place ablaze! What if you would've gotten hurt!" Severus said in a voice that was only half mocking for if she were really to get hurt, and worse if it would have been on account of him, he didn't know what he would've done with himself with the guilt.

"I know what you're doing, Sev, and it's not the same as potions." She crossed her arms and glared at Severus defiantly, daring him to challenge her. He had become accustomed to her stubborn streak, but he would not let this slide. Not when she could be in danger.

"Well then," he said rationally, "why don't we practice our magic only when we're together, Lils? That way we can watch out for each other, no matter if it's potions or just wandless magic." She nodded at him and smiled. Severus felt the lump in the pocket of one of his pockets and decided now was as good a time as any to present her with his gift to her.

"I got something for you too," he said, trying to hide the nervous undertone in his voice as he held out the small poorly wrapped box. She smiled at him a bit in surprise and took the box from his fingers carefully.

"Sev?" He nodded and blushed a bit as she started to unwrap it. A small gasp escaped her lips as she saw what it contained. A tiny owl hung on a thin chain, his eyes sparkling gems that gleamed wisely when the light touched them. It had been his mother's, an old Prince family heirloom, but she never wore jewelry now, and as it was the only item he could afford (having no Muggle or Wizarding money to his name) he had easily nicked it from her box of forgotten jewelry. He had hoped that Lily would like it, but he never expected her reaction. With a small squeek of pleasure she threw herself at him, arms flung about his neck as she embraced him. "Oh Sev! It's beautiful! This is the best gift I've gotten this year!" Immediately she clasped it around her neck. She looked beautiful wearing it, and he smiled at her.

"It suits you, Lily." She smiled at him softly. Again Severus noticed the darkening sky. He did not wish to leave now, but Mum had been very specific when she had wanted him home. Before, obviously, Tobias returned from his 'celebrations' at the local bar, but late enough so he wouldn't arouse attention from anyone who might find a lone boy walking towards Spinner's End on Christmas night suspicious. Severus turned to Lily regretfully.

"I gotta go, Lily. Sorry. Mum wants me..." She stood as well, a sad smile on her lips as she bid him farewell and walked him downstair to the front door. The rest of the family, except of course Petunia, smiled warmly at him as they wished him a "Merry Christmas", and his heart ached a bit as he walked outside. Wrapping the soft, unnaturally warm, scarf about his neck he turned his back on the warmth of Lily and the Evans' home, and his face to the harsh cold winds of the place he should call 'home' but seemed nothing of the sort to him. He sighed, slightly. It had, in fact, been the best Christmas he had ever had.

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><p><strong>Ah, so we get a little more of a glimpse into Sev's home life. Interesting...<strong>

**Thank you so much for reading, and please review! Each one makes my day! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sooo... This is a bit dark. Sorry.**

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><p>Severus could hear the screaming before he was even inside. That sound. He should be used to it by now. Unfortunately, he wasn't.<p>

"Mum…" he whispered to himself, his feet carrying him faster towards the dingy and dilapidated house in Spinner's End. He ran into the house, Lily's scarf hanging loosely around his neck. His eyes widened at the sight before him.

"Mum!" His father had her pinned to the ground. The sweaty, disgusting sweatpants that his father wore each and every day were down to his knees along with a stained pair of underwear. He was grunting. His Mum was screaming.

"No, you're hurting her!" He shouted at his father, but he received no reply. Eileen turned her head, her nose bloody and tears streaming down her face. She watched her son, filled with shame. Her clothes were ripped half off of her, her body covered in bruises and scars.

"Severus, go t-to your room! Don't look, baby! Run!" But Severus couldn't move a muscle. He just couldn't. Tobias was slamming into her, his eyes dark and concentrated. His skinny, yet muscled, frame easily held down his wife as he tore into her.

"Shut up, woman!" He slapped her hard across the face and Eileen winced when he pulled out of her. She looked at Severus, wondering if it was over. Maybe he was done. Her hope was shattered when she felt Tobias pushing back into her, only this time he wasn't entering the normal spot.

"Tobias, please! Not there! OW! Stop!" Tobias snarled and Severus watched as he didn't stop; he just pushed harder.

"I SAID SHUT UP!" This time he punched her, and Eileen felt the bones in her nose shatter. She closed her eyes. Suddenly, she heard Tobias make a sound of surprise and he fell sideways off of her. When she looked up, Severus was on top of his father, his tiny fists pummeling Tobias' stomach.

"Severus, no!" But it was too late. Tobias didn't even bother pulling his pants up. In a moment he had his son pinned to the ground, his eyes crazed with a drunken fury. Severus cowered beneath his father. Tobias leaned down close to Severus, his breath stinking of alcohol.

"BOY! What the FUCK are you doing?!" Severus cringed and didn't say a word. Eileen cowered behind the couch. Her bravery had been stripped of her long ago.

"Tobias, no… Please! He's your son!" Tobias growled and punched Severus hard in the stomach. The small boy let out a cry of pain, tears streaming down his face.

"Daddy, no! Stop! Not tonight, it's Christmas!" He received a knee in the groin for that, and Tobias snarled as Severus yelped, squeezing his thin legs together.

"AND YOU, YOU LITTLE FUCKER, INTERRUPTED ME GIVING YOUR MUM HER CHRISTMAS PRESENT!" Severus started to sob, closing his eyes as he waited for his father to continue with the beating.

_At least Mum's safe._

Tobias gripped his small shoulders in her hands and smashed Severus' head into the hardwood floor. Severus screamed. His head felt like it would nearly crack open and he was seeing stars.

_Think of Lily._

He felt himself being tossed against the wall like a ragdoll.

_Green eyes…_

Another blow to the face and his lip was swelling up, blood dripping from it.

_And she's so nice to me…_

"Go the fuck to your room!" Another punch and he knew he'd have a nasty black eye in the morning.

_She said we're best friends._

His father slammed him against the stairs and Severus groaned. He was barely conscious as he turned his head to see his father back on his mother. She was obviously screaming, but he couldn't hear her over the pounding in his ears. He drug himself up the stairs, his body aching. When he finally made it onto his bed he allowed himself to cry. As his heartbeat slowed, he could hear his Mum screaming again, the sound reverberating throughout the house. He drew his pillow over his head to muffle the sound, gritting his teeth.

After around an hour, the Snape house turned silent.

Severus listened as his father trumped up the stairs, slamming the door as he went to bed. Severus wanted to check on his Mum, but he was afraid. He didn't want to make his father angry at him anymore. He cuddled the warm green scarf close to his body, hating that he had gotten blood on it. He buried his nose in it. He could smell Lily. It calmed him.

"S-Severus? Baby?" he looked up and there was his mother, hunched in the doorway to his room.

"Mummy?," he whispered, his voice cracked. He tried to sit up, but it hurt too much. Eileen hobbled over to his bed and Severus noticed blood was dripping down her legs. She sat down beside him and pulled him close to her. He sniffled and wrapped his thin arms around her waist as she leaned down to kiss the top of his head.

"Oh, my baby… I'm so sorry." He felt her tears dripping into his hair, but he couldn't say a word. "I love you so much. You were so brave."

"Are you ok, Mummy?" His black eyes looked up into hers and Eileen felt immense guilt for what he had seen.

"I- I'm sorry you saw that." He shook his head. He'd seen it before. He'd heard it before.

"Are you ok?" He repeated.

"Yes, sweetheart. You saved me. You did such a good job." She was lying of course, but he needed to know he was appreciated. "But I don't want you ever to do that again. Mummy can handle Daddy, ok? I just want you safe." Severus didn't say anything, afraid and hurt and needing his Mum.

"Ok, Mama." He swallowed, his arms tightening around her.

"Good boy. You're such a good boy. Merry Christmas." He nodded and cuddled up closer to Eileen, tears trickling silently down his cheeks.

"Merry Christmas." She didn't ask where he was. Anywhere was better than here for him, and he smelled like good food. He needed a decent meal. Maybe she'd ask him later. "Will you stay here with me tonight?"

"Yes, baby." She smiled softly down at him and tucked him into the covers, wiping the blood from his lip on her sleeve. She laid down beside him and pulled him close.

Severus snuggled into the warmth of his mother. She smelled like cleaning chemicals and soap, and he was immediately comforted by her. The memory of what had just transpired was locked away with the others and the little broken boy fell asleep cuddled up against his mother. Eileen stroked her son's hair, wishing she could do more for him. She wanted him safe, fed, warm, clean… He needed a friend. She hummed an old Muggle lullaby to him as he drifted off, that being all she could do for him at the moment. Eventually, she fell asleep as well, and her sore body relished the escape of sleep from this Hell. Severus was the only reason she had to live and damn it, someday she'd make this up to him.

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><p><strong>Reviews make me happy. Tell me just how much you hate that man!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Hope you like it :)**

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><p>Cold sunlight drifted through the open air window in Severus' attic room. His body ached. His mind ached. His everything ached. One eye decided to brave awakening and opened narrowly, ready for the worst. Severus lifted and inspected each arm. He knew they'd be bruised, but geez… His skin looked as if someone had painted him black and blue. His Mum shifted beside him and he felt her arms pull him towards her. That made him smile. Some of the pain even seemed to subside.<p>

He couldn't simply fall back to sleep like he so wanted to, however. He had to clean himself up. Otherwise, the wounds would become infected and Mum would have to take him to the doctor for shots again. Mum always took a beating if she ever took him anywhere. His father hated the thought of any money being spent on his worthless son.

Severus rolled on his side with a groan. He bit his lip as he tried and failed to hold in a whimper of pain. As he slowly eased out of his mother's grip, he knew that he wouldn't be seeing Lily any time soon. The wounds would take too long to heal and he hated the thought of her seeing him like this.

For some reason, that thought hurt worse than his body at the moment.

Severus stepped quietly out of the room, carefully closing the door behind him. He could hear the loud, almost cartoonish, snoring coming from his father's room. The noise filled him with hate. He never understood why his Mum never left the horrible beast.

His mother was a quiet and timid soul. At least, that's how she was now. Apparently, when she was younger and her spirit was not yet broken, Eileen Prince had been the first Prince to have the gall to stand up to her Pureblood traditionalist father and marry his Muggle Father. They'd been in love, so he was told, but looking at them now, he could never see it. It was all his fault. Once Severus had shown his first signs of magic as an infant, Tobias had turned nasty. Football star dreams were crushed right alongside Eileen's bones. She was disfigured from all the times he'd broken her limbs just to prove a point, and then forbidden her to go to the hospital. His poor Mum. Oh, he loved her so much.

His legs carried him shakily down the stairs, protesting the cruel treatment of last night as they screamed at him in pain.

_The River._

It had been months since the family had had running water, so if Severus wanted to be any sort of clean or disinfected, the icy water of the river was the only option. He grabbed a small washcloth on the way out and began his journey towards the water. He shivered violently, having no coat and having forgotten Lily's scarf. It was utter torture, and he felt like a dog that had to drag itself by his front legs after being hit by a car. Newly scabbed cuts reopened at the combination of dry wind and movement, seeping blood. The crimson flow looked unreal against his alabaster skin that seemed to grow paler with each drop. It was creating a trail, his path marked perfectly by a red dotted line in the snow.

Finally, he reached the water's edge. He kneeled beside the water, dirty rag in hand and steeped it with the clean water. As he brought it to the scrapes, they stung like hornets. He didn't know whether the pain was because of the actual wound or the freezing water. Either way, he cleansed himself as best as he could, then began to make his slow trek back home.

Thankfully, Tobias was still sleeping when he arrived back home. He listened to his father's snores through the wall, grimacing. He had called that man "Daddy" last night. How could he? He never called his father anything like that before. It was weak sounding, as if he trusted his father not to hit him only because he was his "Daddy." Disgusting. Severus sighed and crawled back into his room. His Mum was beginning to wake up and, hoping for a few more peace filled hours with his mother, he couldn't let that happen. He carefully slipped back into the bed, his trip to the River going unnoticed by her, and he sighed as he felt her warm arms curl around him.

This was the day Severus took a solemn oath. If he was so lucky as to have his own wife and family when he grew up, he would never do anything to hurt them. He would love and protect, never rape or beat. As he fell back asleep, he tried to picture his future family. Funny, his wife always seemed to have red hair.

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><p><strong>Reviews are loved.<strong>


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